by Darren
30. June 2010 15:06
Hands up everyone who's ever tried to cut your own finger nails with a pair of scissors.
It's a lot harder than it sounds – oh sure you start with your left hand (if your right handed -- your right hand if you're a lefty and if you're ambidextrous you can stop reading now).
You get a little creative, trim six or seven times per nail to try and emulate the nice round shape of a pair of nail clippers. All five finger nails done – good job!
Then the tables turn.
You awkwardly hold the scissors in your other hand and… then… well… I had thought about just chewing the nails off of my right hand, but that seemed a little amateurish.
The next thing you do is try to figure out how all the left handed people in the world cope with so many right handed things. I feel bad for you, Matt.
Bravely you press on and that's when you realize that with the scissors not only sitting awkwardly in your left hand, but the blades are sloped differently.
I tried pointing the scissors toward me for a while, but then I realized that I was forcing the blades apart instead of together. When I bent my nail instead of cleanly cutting it I changed it back.
Since the blades are sloped differently when you're holding the scissors leftly (go ahead… check yours now…), you can get your finger a LOT closer to the blade without even meaning to.
I'm sure the bleeding will stop soon.
What I'm just coming to realize now is that shortly exactly half of my stuff will be in the 'wrong' house (where 'wrong' is defined as the one that I'm not currently in).
Guess which house my nail clippers are in…
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Tags: moving